i am happily singleI feel like wearing a tag on my forehead showing that I am okay. Am single and nothing is wrong with me. Perhaps this will convince those who think I don’t have a life, and more so satisfy my heart and mind that I am okay.

I’ve been having these pressure moments. Pressure from myself and pressure from the people around me. Somehow, I’ve believed the lie that a boyfriend will complete me. And so I’ve kept waiting. Only to get disappointed at the end of the day!

You see, we’ve been told that we are ladies in waiting. We’ve been given every tip on how to grow in the Lord and become good women. Now this is not something bad. But am afraid that we’ve done a lot of growing, not really in the pursuit of knowing God and obeying him, but in the pursuit of becoming good girlfriends and wives when prince charming finally arrives. This has ended up making us release more adrenaline that could lead to stress!

So nowadays when we meet up (‘ladies in waiting’) the only thing we talk about is the new crush, some guy that you think is eying you or our dissatisfaction with the title ‘single’. And so we go ahead to hype one another. At the end of the day we behave like desperate people.

Am so like done with that kind of life! The last time I checked God was the author of times and seasons. At this time He doesn’t want me to be in a relationship. Period. So be it! And who said that everyone is called to marriage, anyway? Aren’t there Pauls of our time? What happened to trusting in God? Trusting that He is fully in control and knows exactly what he is doing?

I realized something… If I keep lamenting over my status I’ll miss some very important points. I’ll keep living the future, and the longing for the future will slay the appetite of living the present.

I know I’ve done this not once. Perhaps the difference right now is that am doing it for the first time in my 21st year and a bit more willing to enjoy my singleness. 🙂 Am pretty sure some days will come when the devil will attempt to steal my joy by showing me how singleness sucks. I hope and pray I’ll be strong enough to resist him. And am willing…

So now I feel like reciting the ‘My Commitment as a Christian’ creed. …I am finished and done with low living, sight walking, small planning, smooth knees, colorless dreams, chintzy giving and dwarfed goals… Because am so like done. Completely.