I have an attachment to the high school I went to. It’s so strong that I had wanted to go there for my teaching practice, so badly. That was my first choice. That’s until Kenyatta University happened. For whatever reason, they chose for me a school that had its name ending with Farm. Who does that? (I have always wanted to use that)

So I whined, complained and probably cried (I forget). The struggle to go to that school was so real especially on the morning I reported. I have always had trouble adapting to new people and places. This was no different. I kept to myself the whole day and only talked when asked a question.

It happened that during the day, that Thursday, I invigilated a form three exam. That was when God broke my pride. As I watched the students do the paper, I think I felt what Jesus felt when he looked at the crowds who were like sheep without a shepherd. Compassion moved him. That’s what I felt. Compassion. So I dropped my whining and attitudes towards the school and said, ‘Here I am Lord, use me!'(No I didn’t say it loud. It would have distracted those kids while doing an exam. I said it in my heart. Hehe..)

It’s now two months, and it’s been great. Forget about the conferences I’ve attended and even the insights I post here on the blog. That’s the real testing ground of what you believe. And here are a few things I’ve learned:

  • It’s easier to speak about purity than to live it out. Being in school is like being in a greenhouse. All the crops inside a greenhouse are prevented from pests, bad weather and all. In school, it’s easy to have fellowship with believers because they are just a call away. But outside here it’s dangerous. There are numerous opportunities for sinning. And who will know anyway? None of my friends has visited me (by the way am angry at all of them 🙁 ) and so really how would they know if I gave in to the pressure to conform? A few times I’ve felt like a small helpless lamb surrounded by these salivating hyenas. People, team mafisi, is real.
  • A healthy devotion life is cultivated, not earned. Now that am a Christian I don’t have the default setting of doing my devotions with ease daily. There are days (and many of them for that matter) that the last thing you want to do is devotions. All you want to do after a busy school schedule is sleep. You are very fatigued (from marking compositions written English like Kikuyu. Pun intended) and the morning is precious, you want to redeem every spare minute for sleeping (my friends can tell you more about morning sleep and me). In these circumstances, the temptation to skip devotions or to just read a chapter to fulfill acts of righteousness is very real. And so what to do? Consciously and deliberately beat my body! Other times I’m overcome, and I give in. Forgive me Lord!
  • Relationships don’t thrive by chance. You work on them. I love my friends, and I consider myself loyal to them (I hope they do too). It’s easier to ditch them and pick them up in September when I go back to school than it is to keep them. As I mentioned, none of them has come visiting (why do I feel like complaining!). I decided to work on the friendships after realizing  I could go back to looking for new friends in September. Distance should not be a hindrance for not keeping in touch. So call them at random so we can catch up, visit those I can and pray for them too.
  • There is only a handful of believers outside there. It’s easy to assume everyone is a Christian since my immediate circles are made up of Christians. But then it hit me that everybody doesn’t believe in the things I believe in, and some don’t even care about becoming Christians. Some of these are my workmates, and some are older than me and don’t think I have anything to offer since I’ve not started living. (Someone told me you begin to live when you marry. Before that you are just existing) I, therefore, have a role to live out authentic Christianity practiced with a lot of grace and patience.
  • The place of honoring God is paramount in any Christian’s life. I have to bear this in mind as I teach and interact with students and all other people I meet. I will, therefore, be careful in what I say and how I do things so that I may honor God in all both now and in the future.

I have one more month to go. The experience so far is not regrettable. My prayer stands ‘Be it unto me according to God’s will’.