One of the challenges of adulthood is that there are more hurts to deal with and you soon discover that the number of people you trust continues reducing. Some friendships do not stand long enough while others survive with a number of scars. There is generally more hurt and disappointment resulting to lack of trust.

As human beings, it is obvious that we retreat to defend ourselves from getting hurt the more. In worst cases friendships are broken and the hurt felt is so much that it develops into a scar, a sure reminder of pain even in the future.

I’ve had my fair share of such. One of the things that’s offensive, disappointing and hurtful to me is believing someone is genuine to me only to discover that the smile they show isn’t anything near their intentions and thoughts towards me. It gets me to the core of my heart. I’d rather someone who doesn’t pretend and treats me coldly than one who purports to be a friend but they are far from it.

Among the Christian circles, these cases are even worse. There is a way in which we trust each other so much and almost forget that we are human beings with weaknesses and therefore capable of hurting each other. When the offense is done, it hurts more and cuts deeper into our hearts.

One of the realities we should face is that when we get close to each other we’ll always rub shoulders. It is inevitable. This shouldn’t make us more careful and paranoid when interacting but more willing to forgive and more accommodating.

The hurts caused by people should remind us of the fallenness of this world and man’s depravity, his inability to do anything good apart from Jesus’ help. It should remind us that we should never look to the world in trust, but to a Savior who never fails!

We should always remember that we are cut from the same cloth. We are no better than those who hurt us. We’ve probably done the same things to other people. This is even humbling. It should lead us to treating the people who hurt us in the same way we’d want to be treated when we hurt others. Forgiveness is one of the great lessons that Jesus taught. He further demonstrated this by dying an innocent death to bear the sin and guilt of men in order that we may be justified and forgiven. The cross and God’s grace should humble and motivate us to strive to forgive and bear with each other.

I do not underestimate the pain that could be caused by people. I’ve been there. There was a time I was so hurt, I’d sulk and cry at the thought of what was done to me and at the sight of those who hurt me. It is seriously hurting at times! But then this shouldn’t make erect walls that will require people who come into our lives strive to reach us. Instead, it should make us aware of the human nature- the depravity and wretchedness, and help us bear with each other. It should also lead us to becoming vulnerable in the presence of a Savior who mends broken hearts.

Finally, we should watch out that bitterness doesn’t grow in our hearts as a result of hurt. We should be careful not to say insensitive things to each other, bad mouth each other or do actions that could hurt others. We should love and care genuinely. We are the body of Christ. At the very least we should care for each other. May our interactions draw us near to Christ even as we grow together in love to the glory of God’s name!